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March 28, 2024

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Location:

Millcreek,UT,

Member Since:

Jun 21, 2011

Gender:

Female

Goal Type:

Other

Running Accomplishments:

800m- 2:23

1600m- 5:10

1 Mile- 5:12

3200m-11:03

XC 3 mile-17:55

XC 5k- 19:00

XC 6k- 22:25

Local 5k- 18:42

Local 10k- 41:31

Local 15k- 1:03:55

Unofficial Half (2020)- 1:45:46

Official Half (2021)- 1:49:28

60% (5 miles)- 32:32 (6:30 average)

80% (3 miles)- 18:52 (6:17 average)

16x400s- 82.0 average

20x400s- 82.6 average

SUU Road Race- 23:30 (3.9 miles/6:02 average)

Short-Term Running Goals:

Get up to 45-50 miles/week

Run a sub-19:30 5k again

Train for and race a half marathon

Long-Term Running Goals:

18:45 or under 5k

Run a marathon

Personal:

26 years old, not married, no kids. Going against the norm in Utah.

Mental health advocate, LGBTQ+ rights supporter. Newly identified bisexual woman. Ex-mormon

Former college runner for Southern Utah University

Current Employment and Community Engagement Manager at a special needs company called Atlas Advocacy Services.

Favorite Blogs:

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Miles:This week: 0.00 Month: 0.00 Year: 0.00
Adidas Distancestar Spikes Lifetime Miles: 3.00
Adidas Boston 7 Lifetime Miles: 430.33
Nike Pegasus 34 Lifetime Miles: 493.60
Nike Pegasus 34 II Lifetime Miles: 365.31
Nike Pegasus 36 Lifetime Miles: 480.43
Nike Pegasus 36 II Lifetime Miles: 319.00
Nike Pegasus 37 Lifetime Miles: 188.01
New Balance FuelCore Nergize V1 (walking) Lifetime Miles: 219.85
Nike Pegasus Turbo Lifetime Miles: 31.68
Total Distance
3.00

8:12 average. Almost didn’t go running at all but I forced myself to. I shut off my mind and just ran, stopped trying to coach myself through my depression. It was a release of sorts to just experience it without trying to understand why I felt so sad. I alternate between being apathetic/anxious about my lack of desire to do anything (including eating or getting out of bed) and being intensely sad, hopeless, and not caring about anything. I don’t know which one is worse. 

Got extremely sad when I realized the last time I felt truly happy and upbeat about life was 10 months ago. I’ve never had a severe depressive episode last this long before. Sigh. I’ll just continue to run and do things I enjoy, or used to enjoy. Experience what it feels like to truly laugh and love and relax. Somehow. Without faking it. Remembering the good times today was actually a good thing, even though it made me stop and cry in the middle of my run. Because I remembered back to what it felt like to not be severely depressed. To be hopeful, content, happy, and excited about things. I’d forgotten what that felt like, my life has been so dull trying to make it through one more month, week, or even just through the day on particularly bad days. But now I’m reminded that there is more to life than this drudgery. Things will get better, eventually. 

Adidas Boston 6 VII Miles: 3.00
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
Comments
From Burt on Fri, Feb 22, 2019 at 11:01:25 from 70.176.85.97

Perhaps what you need is to join one of my Ragnar teams. You'll be happy for a year! LOL!

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